Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 3

Mareez- Dr. Sahab Mein boht khush rehta hoon,

Neend sukoon se aati hai,

Zindagi main Aman hi Aman hai,

Har kaam main Dil b Lagta hai,
Koi pareshani hi nahi.

Aisa kiyon hai ?

Doctor: Mein aap ki Bimari samajh gaya hoon.
Aap ki zindagi may
Vitamin "she'' ki kami hai...

Doctor To Santa:

Aap ki Ek Kidney Fail Ho Gayi Hai..

Santa Pehle To Bohat Roya

Phir Aansu Ponchte Huwe
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Kitne Number Se ??

Teacher: Gaali kya hai?
Student: Krodh ke smay mukh se nikle ashudh shabdon ka samuh
Jinke uchcharan ke paschat Vyakti ke hriday Ko ShantiKa anubhv hota hai.

Ravan=Bhiksha de do

Lady=Ye lo

Ravan=Ha ha ha..
Main bhikshuk nahi Ravan hu.

Lady=Main bhi Sita nahi Rakhi sawant hu...

Snta-Ye Nya Mobile Kab Liya?

Bnta-Liya Nai..

Gf Ka Uthaya H

Snta-Q?

Bnta-Wo Roz Kahti K

Tum Mera Phon Nhi Uthate..

Aaj Mauka Dekh K Utha Liya

True love:

Baba :- beta tujh par chudail ka saya hai

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Ladka :- baba me thappad mar dena

agar

meri gf k bare me kuch kha to...

Boy: Tumhara naam kya hai?

Girl: Kyun btau? mein tumhai janti bhi nahi!

Boy: Na batao mein konsa tumhai apni ferari mein betha raha hun!

Girl: Neha, B.com 2nd Yr

Wo samne wali gali me right hand pe 4th number pe mera ghr hai 32/B,

Ghar mein ek chota bhai n mummy papa hain,

Tution timings 6-8.

Teacher: Batao Pankha Male Hai Ya Female?



SANTA: Agar KHAITAN Ka Hai To Male Aur USHA Ka Hai To Female Hoga.

Banta:aj party kis khusi me?
Santa:meri scooter kho gayi
Banta:to


Santa:shukar mano me us par nai baitha tha warna me b gum ho jata.

Accident k baad:

Driver- maine car ki headlight on kar k bataya tha ki

pahle mujhe nikalne do

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Santa- humne bhi to wiper chala kar bataya tha ki

'Na Kake Na'. .

Santa ko uski Girl Friend ne sms kiya....
"I Miss Your"

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Santa Ne Apna Khatarnaka Dimag Lagaya,
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.aur Do Ghantea Baad Reply Bheha........."I Mr. You........

Today,Santa Was Lying On Beach,
Amrican:R U Relaxing?
Santa:No I M Gopal Singh,
Anothr Amrican: R U Relaxing?
Santa: No (Shouting) I M Gopal Singh
&
Left Tht Place In Anger.
Then Santa Asks 1 American,
R U Relaxing?
American:Yes
Santa Slaps Him & Says,
"Haramkhor Sab Tujhe Dhund h or tu yaha pada h

2 Aurton ko 20 saal Qaidki saza mili.

20 saal tak jail me 1 he kamre me rehne ke bad

2no ne riha hone pe kaha. .

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Chal baki Batyn phone pe kryn ge. . .:D:P

Dedicated 2 0l Girls:
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"Apki kahani humari zubani"
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Apke pas dimag hai,
chalta ni alag bat hai.
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Ap smart hai,
k0i manta ni hai alag bat hai.
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Ap sareef hai,
lagta ni alag bat hai.
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Kaafi izzat hai apki,
k0i karta ni alag bat hai.

Ek aurat coma main chali
gai . . .
Pati murda samjh kr jalane
chala ....
Raste main arthi khambe se
takrane se aurat ko hosh agaya...
1 saal bad aurat sach main mar
gai . . .

Sab log RAM RAM SATYA hai
bolty ja rahe thy
. Lekin .

Pati ki zuban pe ek hi baat thi

KHAMBA BACHA ke. ..

PM to Secretary- Jab se me PM Bana Hu

Meri Maa ko Hichki Bahut Aati Hai.

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Secretary- Actualy Sir,

Petrol ke daam badhne se

Log Aapki Maa Ko Bahut Yaad Karte Hai.

Boy to his gf : u knw what??

Aaj mene blackberry liya :))

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Gf : ohh woow

mere dad bhi aaj yellow mango layee the :))

badaa maza aaya khake :p

MORAL : Aur Phansao GOVT Colg ki Larkian

Naukar- Sahab,

aap ka kutta to bilkul Aadmi jaisa lagta hai,

kya khilate ho?

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Malik- Nalayak,

wo kutta nahi

mera beta hai.

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Engineering kar raha hai

aur

aaj- kal Exams chal rahe

Aunty: Arrey beta tum kitne badey ho gaye ho.

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Beta: Haan aunty,

aur koi option hi nai tha

Teacher: Acha insan wo hi h wo dusro k kaam
aye Aman: Par madam,
exam mein na aap
humare kaam aati h
aur na hi kisi aur ko
aane deti h.

Ek shayar garibi se tang aakar daku ban gaya..

daketi karne bank gaya

or

kaha..

Arz kiya hai..

"taqdeer me jo hai wahi milega,

hands up..

koi apni jagah se nahi hilega..." .

phir cashier se kaha..

kuch khawab meri aankho se nikal do,

jo kuch bhi hai jaldi se is bag me dal do..

Height of Kuch Bhi
Teacher:Agr 1 aam ki ped pr 10
kele lage h, or un me se 7
amrood tod liye to kitne angur
bache?
Student:Sir 9 Hathi
Teacher:Wah tumhe kaise pata chala?
Student:Sir Qki me aaj lunch
me gobhi ki sabzi laya hu

Moral of the Story: Roz brush karo
warna petrol mehnga ho jayega..!

4 boys on bike...
Police:- triple riding is
banned aur tum 4 baithe
ho??
Boys shocked...
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look behind..
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and says:- saalo 5wa kaha
gir gya...??

Girl1:I am in love
Girl2:who is he??
Girl3:how does he look?
Girl4:wat color?
Girl5:how tall is he??
Girl6:wat is he doing?
Girl7:who r his frnds?
Girl8:total wealth?
Aftr full inspection
All Girls: Be careful he might be a bad
guy
Girl1: OK.
Same situation
Boy1: I am in love
ALL Boys: Bhai Party

Dukh Na Dena Mere DOST Ko.

Mujhe Chahay SUKH Ki bahaar Dedo..!

Ghoome New CYCLE Pe DOST Mera..

Mujhe Bhalay Hi Purani Si MERCEDES
CAR Dedo..!

Bhooka Na Rakhna Mere DOST Ko Khane Ko Taazi DAAL Dedo,

Mujhe Bhalay Hi Kal Ka liay Pizza
Hut,mcdonalds, Hardees

AUR..
DEW Ka Sirf 1 Glass Dedo..!!

Teacher: Tumhare Papa Kya Karte Hai?
Mintu: Wo Sabke Such-Dukh Bantate Hai.
Teacher: Kya Matlab!
Mintu: Wo Postman Hai.

A Very Emotional Lines :
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Maine"Maa"Se Pucha,
"Kab Tak Meri Fikar Me is Tarah
Raton ko jagti Rahogi?"
"Maa"Ne Pyar se Mera Maatha Chooma Aur Kaha: "Jab Tak tu Apni Dusri Maa se
Rat ko Phone pe Bat karna nahi
Chodega...
Moral : MAA SAB JANTI HAI..!! ;)

Judge-Na Jane Kyu

Mujhe Tumhari Shakl Jani Pahchani Si Lag Rahi Hai!

Mujrim-Huzoor!

Main Reshma Bai Ke Kothe Me Tabla Bajata Hu.

Chintu ne bled se grlfrnd ka naam apne haath parlikha
Aur
5 min baad jor jor se rone laga,
Uska dost: Q ro rha ho?
Chintu:Abey,purani wali ka likh dia..

Jailer: Faasi se pehle kisse miloge?
Santa: Biwi Se
Jailer: Maa-Baap se nahi
Santa: Maa-Baap to agla jnm lete hi mil jyenge
biwi ke liye sala phir 25 saal wait karna padega!! :d