alok singh's Quote Collection

Akele gaye they door ek pal ke liye,
Magar aapke dil ke kareeb they harr pal ke liye…;
Kaise bhulengey aapko ek pal ke liye…,
Jab kho chuke hain khudd ko harr pal ke liye..!!!

Wife : Ek baat bolu??
Husband : Bolo
Wife : Maaroge to nahi?
Husbund : Nahi to, kya baat hai?
Wife : mai pregnant hun
Husband : Hurray!!! Its gud news, dar kyu rahi thi??
Wife : College ke dino mai papa ko bataya tha to badi maar padi thi.

Girls Collage mai Strike ho gai,Sabhi girls Nare Laga rahi hai,
Girls k satth Boys bhi unka satth de rahe hai,
Girls ne Nare lagate huye "HAMARI MANGE....,
Piche se Awaz aye,"SINDUR SE BHARO....".

Wife: suniye g aap ka dost galat ladki se shaadi kar raha hai. Aap usse rokte kyon nahi?

Husband: main kyon rokon? Us ne mujhe roka tha kya.

Patient: mujhe problem hai. Na khaon to bhok lagti hai, na sou to neend aati hai, zada kam kar k thak jata hoon.

Doctor : sari raat dhoop main betho theek ho jao gaye.

The most determinative & motivating sentence which shud always be followed in life.
The RACE is NOT OVER because I haven't WON yet.

Santa: tere result da ki banya?

Pappu: madam kendi si class vich 1 saal hor lagana hai.

Santa: phir theek hai, saal chahe 2,3 hor lag jayn, bas fail na hona.

Santa weeping. Friend asked ki hoya?

Santa: bapu mer gaya.

After 5 mints santa again crying.

Friend asked: hun ki hoya?

Santa said: meri behan da baapu v mer gia

Hazaro ladkiya aati hai
Hazaro jati hai
Hazaro hasti hai
Hazaro rulati hai
Lekin mere dost sath vohi nibhati hai
Jo Doli me aati hai

Aur gale pad jati hai.

Dost: "Tumhari toh RAM - SITA ki jodi lagti hai"

Man:"Bilkul Galat hai:

Naa to koi meri biwi ko utha ke le jaata hai, Naa hi ye dharti me samaati hai!

20000 index ki mahima nirali hai,
Suna hai nifty ambani ki gharwali hai,

Ye kaisi diwali hai,
Sensex hai bhara bhara,
Par aam admi ki jeb abhi bhi khali khali hai.!

Sardar looked at himself in mirror and said:
Is ko kahain dekha hai. Then he said:

Oye yaad aya, ye to woh he kamina hai jo
Shaadi ki album main meri biwi k saath hai

Wife mere iraday baray neek hain, aap 1000 mai ek hain.

Sardar: mera dimag bara taiz hai, pehlay ye bata baki 999 kon hai?

Train mai ek husband apni wife say: "tujh say shadi kar k pachta raha hoon."

"dil karta hai tujhe kutttay k aagay daal doon"

Samnay wala passenger bola: "bhao bhao"

Ek baar sardar ji kahain jaa rahe tahe k ek diwar par padha "padhne wala gadha"

Sardar ko bohat ghussa aya, unhon ne mita kar likh diya! "likhne wala gadha"

Teacher:" What is your name?".
Student: " Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai."

Teacher:" When I ask a question in English, answer it in English."
Student:" My name is Sunlight

My sweetheart,
My kuchikoo,
My nonumonu,
My golumolu,
My darlng,
My cutipie,
My jaanu,
My lovely,
My hertbeat,
My sweetst


DOLL


Is missng.

Dikhe to batana..

Man to hotel manager: jaldi chalo, meri wife khirki se kodh kar jaan dena chati hai.

Manager: so .. Sir what can i do?

Man: abey khirki nahi khul rahi.

Doctor to lady: kiya aap dilevery k waqat bache k baap ko apne pass dekhna chati hain?

Lady: nahi un ko mere husband pasand nahi karte.

2007 ka faqir: baji bhoka hoon Allah k waste khana de do.

Baji: abhi khananahi bana, baad main aana.

Faqir: mera number le lo, jab khana ban jaye to miscall kar dena.