Most Popular Jokes Wishes and Status Messages

Ek Bar Pappu Interview ke liye jata hai....
Boss - Aisi kaun se chij hai, jisme to pahiye hote hain?
Pappu - Cycle
Boss - Nahi, Hero Cycle.
Boss - Accha ek or chij batao, aise kaun si chiz hai, jisme chaar pahiye hote hain?
Pappu- Car?
Boss - Nahi, Honda Car.
Pappu - Ab mein ek question puchu kya aapse?
Boss - Yes,
Pappu - Aise kaun se chij hai, Jo Safed Gole ke ander Kale gole jese lagti hai?
Boss - Aankh?
Pappu - Nahi, Saale.....Teriiii Maaaaa Ki Aankhhhh....

Premi to premika- "Darling mujhe tumhari aankhon me saari duniya dikhai deti hai.."
Peeche se ek budhha bola- "Hamari gaiyya nahi mil rahi.. Dikhe to batai.." ;-)

Anty chote puppy se: Oye hoye! kitna sona doggy hai!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!
Boy: Par anty..
Anty: Oye kiss karne de!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!!
.
.
.
Boy: Par anty iska muh idhar nahi us taraf hai!

Santa: oye banta machli khayega?
Banta:nahi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: oye chadd yaar, chappal pahen k kha lena.

Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed?
Bcoz she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a TV.

Baap- Tumne Apni Mummy Se Unchi Aawaz Me Baat Ki.?

Beta- Mujhe Pata Hai Ki
Apko Jalan Ho Rahi Hai..

..Kyo Ki Aap Aisa Nahi Kar Sakte

santa: jadon meri navi navi shadi hoi menu meri biwi ini sohni lagdi c k dil karda c kha hi jawan.
Friend: aur ab???

Santa: kha hi jaanda te changa c

Banta: Yaar teri wife ki maut ka bada afsos hua, Vaise hua kya tha? Santa: Goli lagi thi mathe main.
Banta: Bhagwaan ka shukar kar ke aankh bach gayi.

In a class room.
Girl- Who get more angry boys or girls?
Boy- Girls only.
Girl- How?
Boy- If I kiss u, u'll get angry, but when u kiss me I'll never get angry..

Pandit bolyo: dulha dulhan the kyun jaghdo karo ho,
The dono jeevan gadi ke do pahiya ho ,
Ab chain se apni jeevan gadi kheecho,
Dulha: Re pandit tharo to dimag hi kharab ho gayo ho,
Arey je gadi mein ek pahiya cycle ko ho,
Dusro tractor ka ho to gadi kaiyan chalegi !!

Husband Makes a Glass of Whisky & asks wife: Lo Pio isko!

Wife tastes & says: Chhi, Kitni karvi hay!

Husband: Aur tu sochti hay K mein Roz Ayyashi Karta hun!

Santa: Yaar aaj to 1 Rs. me 3 amrood mil gye.
Banta: Wo kaise?

Snta: 1 Rs. ka 1 usne dia, 1 mai utha k bhag gya, or 1 usne muje fek ke mara...

Mama ne nayi swift Car Li,
swift Car K Peche Likhwaya

"SAAWAN KO AANE DO"
Peche se truck Ne Thok Diya,

Truck Par Likha tha
"AAYA SAAWAN JHOOM KE"

Santa g ka ghora race main sbse peechay tha,

kisi ne poocha:

Santa apka ghora konsa hai?

Santa:O dekh jinnay sareyan nu

agay laya hoya ae.

Teacher: Aaj Ka Paper Aasaan Tha Ya Mushkil
Ravi: Padne Me To Aasaan Tha, Par Karne Me Mushkil.

judge: u are crossing your limit.
Lawyer: kaun saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: hoe dare u calling me saala?
Lawyer: my lord i said kaun sa law aisa kehta hai.

Miss: Aaj Tum Late Q Aae?
School 7 baje Shuru Hota Hai Fir der Q Ki?

Kid:Miss,Aap Meri Itni Fikar Mat Kiya Karo Log Galat Samajhte Hai.!

Girl: "How Much Do You Love Me?"

Boy: "Look At The Sky And Count The Stars."

Girl: "But, It's Daytime..."

Boy: "Haha, Exactly."

Ek lady train se utri, ek pathan se poocha ye konsa station hai?

Pathan ne socha… socha… socha… socha… socha phir bola

“Baji ye Railway Station hai”

Teacher: childrens exams are nearing,If u have any doubt u can ask me..
Boys: In wich printing Press the question paper are printed?

Apple = Vitamins
Vitamins = Power
Pwer = Work
Work = Money
Money = Girlfriend
Girlfriend = Tension
Tension = Heart Attack
Heart Attack = Death
See what all prblms an apple can make.

AMERICA: Hamare Kutte Fotball khelte hai.
JAPAN : Hamare Machhi Dance Karte hai.
CHINA : Hamare Hathi Cricket Khelte hai.
INDIA : HAMARE GADHE MASSAGE PADHTE HAI.

Being in a Relationship and being in a Hospital is the same in India..


Every1 asks
"Serious hai kya?".... :)

Boy: I’m searching for the
most beautiful girl..!!

Girl: Look I came for you..!!
Boy: That’s nice! Now help
me to find her..!

teacher: wo konsi chiz hai jo tum roz dekh to sakte ho par tod nahi sakte .
student: apka mooh.......

Santa: Dr.sahab main jb BV ko kiss karta hu to us k muh se
Smell aati hai.
Dr.“kamal hai jb mainne check kya tha tb to lipstick ki khushbu aarahi thi”

teacher:bachoo my name is khan dekh kar kya lesson mila?
bachee:my name is khan se ye samajh me aya ke paglo se bhi ladkiya pat sakti hai.................

Wife-janu, kash aap msz hote,main aapko save karti,jab chahe padhti
Husband- kanjus,save hi karke rakhti ya apni kisi saheli ko forward bhi karti?

Ek deewar par likha tha 'Yaha kutte susu karte hain' Santa ne waha susu kiya. Fir muskura kar bola-ise kehte hai dimaag, susu maine kiya naam kutte ka aaya.

Ek important message...
Kabhi toot kar
bikhro to mujhe yaad kar lena mere dost...


Hum thoda bahut welding ka kaam bhi jaante hain.. ;)