Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 7

Santa-Main tujhe phone kar raha tha, par tera mob no bhul gya
Banta-Hatt pagal!
msg karke puch leta
Santa-Sorry yaar
dimag me nahi aaya.

Girl chatting to a stranger on a chat...

Stranger: Hey could you give me your email id?

Girl: Yeah.. It is [email protected]

Stranger: Take mine [email protected] ;)

Laila ne majnu ko 1 ped k piche dekha or boli
Tum majnu hona?
Majnu bola ha,
Phir kuch der bad use jharioun k piche dekha to boli,
Tum majnu hona?
Wo bola ha
Phir kuch der bad use diwar k piche dekha or kaha
Tum majnu hona?
Majnu bola
HAAN
Haan
Mein Majnu hun
''potty" karne degi ki nahi..

GIRLS: Mohabbat to kisi 1 se karungi

Ho sake,to kisi nek se karungi.

Lekin jab tak na milega,wo nek ladka

"TRY"to har 1 ko karungi..

Boys: Arz kiya h

koi ladki hame thukra de to Gum nhi,

Koi Ladki hume thukra de to gum nhi,






Are uss ladki ki maa ki. kismat footi

jiske damad hum nahi.

SANTA Ghar aaya to sochne laga k aaj kya khas kam karna tha?
bhul rha hu kya tha?
Sochta Rha
Raat 2 baje Yaad Aya
AAJ TO JALDI SONA THA

Wife:Dekho na mujhe wo admi ghoor-ghoor ke dekh raha hai.
Husband:Are wo to bhangarwala hai.
Bekar maal par nazar rkhna uski aadat ha.

Santa teacher ne exam ke liye Que. Paper banaya..
Paper dekhte hi saare bachche behosh ho gaye ..Question.
1. China kis Desh me hai ?
2. 15 Aug kis D luv u 2.ate ko Aati hai ?
3. Green Rang kis Colour ka Hota hai ?
4. Tamatar ko Hindi may kya Bolte hai ?
5. Mumtaz ki Qabar main Kaun Dafan hai ? .

Santa: Banta Bata
Ranveer Kapoor Or Petrol Me Kya Samanta Hai?
No Ans By Banta!.
Santa: Abey! Dono Ke Hi Rate Bina Matlab Ke Badh Rahe He

Santa:Wow .. u look so perfect
with incredible body and flower
like skin.. what do you use ?
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Banta:Adobe Photoshop CS5!

Santa Road par pada tha
Policeman-Itni Q pee rakhi hai?
Santa- Mazburi thi
Police- Kya mazburi thi?
Santa- Botal ka dhakkan gum ho gaya tha.

Snta Clas Me Hans Raha Tha
1ladki Boli STaND UP Kaun Ho Tum


Snta:Tum Kon Ho?
Ladki:Me MONITOR Hu
Snta: TeRE Din Gye pagli ab laptop or LCD ka zamana hai...

SANTA:jis LADKi ko tune SWiMMiNG POOL mein DOOBNE se BACHAYA,usne FANDA Laga kar KHUDKHUSHi kar Li.
BANTA:us LADKi ko to maine SUKHANE ke Liye LATKAYA tha.

Teacher to SANTA
Tumne Home work Q nhi kiya?
.
Deadly Answr Given By
SANTA-Sir Qki
Hum to "Hostel" Me rehte He.

Patni- Jaanu, Aaj Apne Bahut Dino Baad Meri Photo Kheenchi Hai
Pati- Kya Karu..
..Aaj Mere Sar Pe Wild-Life Photography Ka Bhoot Sawaar Hu

GOLU Bache Ki Report Lene Hospital Gya
Report Bohat Kharab Thi
GOLU Bache Se Bola "Oy School Te School
Tenu Ethey V Meri Izat Da Koi Kheyal Nai

Plumber Ne Pipe Naya Lagane K Baad 1000/Rs Bill Diya
Sonu- Itna To Mai Engineer Ho K B Nhi Kamata
P- Mai B Nahi Kamata Tha Jab Engineer Tha

Santa Qabristan Me Charas Pi Raha Tha

Police=Kya Kar Rahe Ho ?

Santa=Abbu K Liye Dua,

Police=Ye To Bachche Ki Qabr Hai

Santa=Abbu Bachpan Me Hi Mar Gaye The.

GOLU Cycle Sath Le K Bhaga Ja Rha Tha
Raste Me Kisi Ne Kaha K
GOLU Chai To Peete Jao
GOLU-Agr Itna Time Hota To Cycle Pe Na Baith Jata

Ladke Ne 1 Ladki Ko Dekh Ke Comment Pass Kiya-
'Arre Wah, Kya Item Hai'
Ladki Muskurai Aur Boli-
'Pagal, Ye Item To Tere JIJU Ka Hai'...

Santa K Bete Ki Roti Par Se Chooha Guzar Gaya
Son: Mujhe ye Roti Nahi Khani
Santa: Kha Le Putar
ChOOhe Ne kaun si chapal pehan rkhi thi.

Santa-Kya mai tere mobile se apni grfrnd ko msg karu? Banta-Kyun apne mobile se kar. Santa-Nahi yaar hand writing pehchan legi na Badi"chalaak"h..

If You Pass In Exam:
Mom: Ktni Khushi Ki Baat Hai
Dad:Mera Beta Sher Hai
Lover:So Sweeeet
&
Friends:Kutte! Kamine! Zalil! Tu Ne Itna Kb Padha

Hanuman-Bhagwan ab me dharti par nhi reh sakta..
God-Q.?
Hnuman-Pehle log lait kar matha tekte the
fir thoda sa juk kar matha tekne lage.. MAI fir b khush tha.. lekin ab to ghor kalyug aa gaya hai GOD-kya hua? Aaj mandir me ek ladki aayi aur haath hila kar boli-'HI,HANNU;-)

Policeman to santa. Sab kuch bata warna chaddi utar ke peetunga.
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Santa: Oji chori maine ki hay aap ku chaddi utaro ge

Sense Of Responsibility:
A man goes in Library
& asks Librarian
for a book on 'Suicide' ..
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Librarian:
O Bhaisaab ! Vapis kon dene aayega??

Boy:Hame mile abi 3 din hue he aur tumne shaadi ka faisla b kar liya!
GirL:Main us Bank me 3 saal se hu jisme tumara A/C hai.!

Santa: Mujhe Patni Ka Hath Bantana Hai
Chutti Chahiye.
Boss: Nahi Milegi.
Santa: Shukriya,Janta Tha Musibat Ki Samay Aap Hi Madad Karenge.

Beta- Papa, Aapne Humari Naye Car Ka Naam Mummy Ke Naam Par Kyo Rakha Hai.?
Papa- Beta, Kyo Ki Yeh Bhi Mere Control Ke Baahar Hai.!

Gujarati wife : Shahjahan ne Mumtaz ki yaad me TAJMAHAL BANaya,
aap mere marne k baad kya BANdhyege..??
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Husband: Manju mausi ka tiffin

Teacher: Name a device which turns your thoughts into speech.
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Santa: Daaruu madam ji (Alcohol) ............:-)