Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 20

Wife: Ye aap ki shirt per lipstick ka nishan kahan se aaya.. ?

Husband: Mai khud heran hon!
Maine tu uss wakt shirt utari hui thi..

Boy: Papa mjhe Nokrani se pyar hy
Mei us se shadi kronga.

Major Rohail: Nokarani ko rani banane ka na socho.

Boy: Kyu?

Major Rohail: Yehi galti mei ne b ke thi beta.

Hostel student 2 his frnd:

"yaar dhoka ho gya".

Friend-"kya ho gya?".

studnt-"bhai kitab k paise mangvaaye the,

gharwalo ne kitabe bhej di''.

Anti Misba: Beta batao "SUCCESFUL" main kitne
"C" aate hai?



Boy: Anti aap Ehtiyatan 3 dafa "C" laga lo.

aadmi jyotish se

meri shaadi q nahi ho rahi..?

jyotish:

ab qudrat ne teri qismat mein dukh nahi likhy to mein kiya karun...

Santa: Yar muje Major Rohail ne social work krne Pr bohat mara.

Batna: Social Work?

Santa: Han, me ne qabristan k gate pr Welcome ka board lagaya tha.

mein tumhy bangla dilaonga
boy:
mein tumhy bangla dilaonga
car dilaonga
gold k dhiar laga dunga...


girl:
acha ye batao shaam ko park aao gy...???


boy:
haan agar dost ny bike de di tou....

Santa g ka ghora race main sbse peechay tha,

kisi ne poocha:

Santa apka ghora konsa hai?

Santa:O dekh jinnay sareyan nu

agay laya hoya ae.

Teacher – Agar irada pakka kar k kuch kaam karo tou woh poora hota hai…!!!

Student – Rehne dain miss, agar aisa hota to aaj aap meri baahon me hoti..

1st Pathan: Yara ye jahaz itna bara hoti hai

isay paint kese krte hain?

2nd Pathan: Woi Pagala jab ye door ja k chota sa ho jati hai phir paint krte hain

santa: jadon meri navi navi shadi hoi menu meri biwi ini sohni lagdi c k dil karda c kha hi jawan.
Friend: aur ab???

Santa: kha hi jaanda te changa c

Santa- bhai jaldi jao tumhare ghar mein pani ghus gaya hai.
.
.
.
.
Banta- Kyun jhuth bolta hai,ghar mein pani kaise ghus sakta hai,ghar ki chabi jo mere pass hai.

1 Billi Chohey ko Pakar Rahi Thi,
Choha Bhag Bhag Kar Jab Thak Gaya


To Barrey Style Se Khary ho Kar Bola:









"Billo Rani! Kaho to Abi Jaan De Don." :-)

Robert:-Boss isne kuch nahi kiya phir ise saza kyu di.
Ajit:-smart boy!Aajkal PREPAID ka jamana hai.Pehle saza bhugto phir galti karo

Teacher- Netaji, apka beta fail ho gaya hai aur aap laddu khila rahe hai?Netaji- 70 ladko ki class me 60 fail hai,bahumat 2 mere bete ke saath hai.

Ustad: Konsa Prinda Sab Se Taiz Urta Ha?
Boy: Hathi
UstaD: Nalaiq,Tera Bap Kia Krta Hy?
Boy: BSP KA Unit incharg he
Ustad: Shabash Hathi is the right answer .

Major Rohail: Hamara Beta Nalaik Hai.
Hamesha Test Main "Andaa" Lata hai.


Anti Misba: Tum Kya Jano "Andey" ki Qeemat.

Pata hai Aaj Kal 105 Rupee Darjan hain. :-)

Pathan: Yar Sooraj Raat Ko
Kyu Nhi Nikalta?


2 pathan:
kia pata nikalta bi ho
andhera itna hota hai kahan dikhai day ga...

Ek Boy Ro Raha Tha:

2nd Boy: Oye kya hua?

1st Boy: Aaj mere Abbu ne Mujhe Juta Mara Hai.

2nd Boy: Tum Khush Naseeb Ho.

"Jutta" Sirf "Azeem" Logon ko he Mara Jata Hia.

Beta-Papa aap press kyon karte hain. Papa-Isase salvaten nikal jati hai. Beta-Fir to achchha hai, main Dadaji ke gaal ki salvaten nikal dunga.

Major Rohail: Jab tum itni tezi se garri chalatey ho To mujhe bohat darr lagta hai.

Driver: Major Sahab aap b meri tarha ankhen Band kar liya kro.

Santa ne apne 6 months k baby
ki birthday partyrakhi,kisine
pucha:6 month k baby ka B'Day kese.
Santa:Hum semester system ko follow karte hai

santa Banta se:

America main Hollywood hai.

India mai Bollywood hai.

England mai kya hai ?

Banta:

England mai Collingwood hai.. :-)

Anti Misba: Tumari itni hansi kyu Nikal rhi hy?

Major Rohail: Tumara new dress dekh kar.

Anti Misba: Oh Acha! Is ka matlab tumne Abi new dress ka BILL nhi dekha.

Teacher to Pathan: 10 Fruits k Naam Batao?





Pathan:

5 Amrood
5 Aanar. :-)

Major Rohail: Ye main bardasht nhi kr sakta,
Tumare hotel me bohat saari Makheyan hai.


Waiter: Hukam karen sir! Aap kitni bardasht kr sakte hy?
Baki ko bahar nekal dun ga.

Shaadi mein khana khula...

Santa ko plate nahi mili..

Santa apni jholi mein khana dalne laga..

Logon ne poocha Ye Kya..

Santa: Daagh To Chala Jaye Ga...

Ye Waqt Phir Nahi Aaye Ga...

Pathan: Mai Ullu kharedne gya par Nhe khareed ska.

Major Rohail: Kyu? Qeemat zeada tha ya Ullu pasand nhe aya?


Pathan: Ullu ne mre sath jane se inkar kr dya.

1st Pathan: Mere bache honge

To 1 ko Karachi

Aur 1 ko Lahore chor aonga....

2nd Pathan: Woh Kyu...?

1st Pathan: Kal T.V. per bata rahe they

Ke bachon ke darmiyan waqfa zaruri hai...

Santa: Muje E-Mail bnana hy.
Santa
Santag
Santa123
Santaabc
Koe b nhe mil rha.

Major Rohail: Tum "AKALMAND SANTA" try kro 100% mil jye ga.