Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 27

chintu:Papa what's the difference between mother's tears & wife's tears ?
father : Mother's tears affect ur HEART & wife's tears affect ur POCKET.

jagti aankho me 1 khawab aaya,
koi humdard hai mera yeh khayal aaya
chot lagi thi dil par to dhayan aaya,
kal b tanha tha aaj b khud ko tanha paya...

Lali: 12 Baje Ghar Ane Ka Samay Hai? Kab Se Intzar Kar Rahi Hu.
Santa: Ye Jagte Rehne Ka Smy H? 4 Ghante Se Tumhare Sone Ka Intzr Kr Raha hu.

unki aankhe zindgi lagti hai,
unki saanse bandgi lagti hai,
ashiqi me unki haal kuch is tarah huya hai,
ki ab unki nafrat bhi mohbbat si lagti hai..

1Budha Budhiya ko Ghur Raha tha.
Budhiya Use Galiya Dene Lagi.
1Ladka Aya Bola-Kya hua?
Budha-kuch nahi Beta,Purana Calender hai FADFADA RaHA HAI.

sonu 2 meter lambi pipe se hukka pi raha tha,
monu itne lambe pipe se kyu pi raha hai
sonu yaar dr saab ne tambaku se dur rahne ko kaha hai...

Happy Sing: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta h
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani, woh le ati hai,
Dost: Garam pani kuon?
Happy: Usse Bartan Achay Dhultay hai

Girl: Aajtak Tumne Kiss Nahi Kia Kiss Karona Muje
Santa: Nahi
Girl: Q Nahi?
Santa: Bade-Budhe Kah Gae He Aurato Ko Muh Nahi Lagana Chahiye.. ;-)

Bhikhari: Ek Rupaye Ka Sawal Hai Bachcha?
Chintu: Ganit Ke Master Sahab Bagal Me Hain, Unhi Se Poochh Lo.

Teacher: Tumhare Papa kya kaam karte hai?Baccha:"KFC" ke Maalik hain..Teacher: Nice, (so rich) KFC ka kya matlab hai?Baccha: "KALLU FRUIT CHAAT"...

Santa: Mujhe Raat Bhar Neend Nahi I.
Banta: Q?
Santa: Q Ki Kal Raat Bhar Neend Mein Yahi Sapna Dekhta Raha Ki Main

Jaag Raha Hu

Banta: What did you do before you got married to Jeeto bhabi.
Santa: Anything I wanted to do.

In an examination hall, a gal asks santa sitting on d desk next 2 her,
"Mujhe is answer ki starting bata de baki main likh lungi".
Santa said, The"

Santa boasting to his friend. You know I am a good collector of antiques.
Banta: Yes I know, I have seen your wife.

USA:We 1st landed in Moon.
Rus:We 1st landed in Venus.
Santa: 1st landed in Sun
USA: U cant. Its too hot
Santa: We landed at Night

Student: Can I take the same book that I took a few days ago?
Librarian: Is it that interesting?
Student: No. I wrote my GF telephone no. on it.

Pota;Daadi Aapne kon kon se Mulk Ghume hai?
Dadi;Beta Pakistan,
Hindustan Or Afganistan,
Pota;Ab konsa Ghumogi?
Pichhe se Dada bola-Qabristan.

Policeman: How did this accident occur?
Motorist: The sign just there says; Stop-Look-Listen. And while I was doing that, the train hit me.

Santa school me hans raha tha,
1 ladhka bola chup kar
santa:-Q,tum kon ho..?
Ladhka:-main moniter hu
Santa bola:-main CPU hu...Ab bol...

Baap : Sharab, Cigarette, Larkiyan Ye Sab Tumhari Jaan k Dushman Hain..
.
.
.
.

Beta : Jo Shakhs Apne Dushmano Se Bhaag jaiey

Wo Mard Nahi Hota abba...

Santa:Mujhe Kitab Likhne Me 1 Saal Lag Jata Hai.
Banta:Itni Mehnat Kyo Karte Ho 15 Rupaye Me Likhi Hui Kitab Mil Jati Hai.

makan malik: 500 rupaye mahine ka kiraya hoga! kirayedar:thik hai; par apke makan me bahut chuhe daud rahe hai... Makan malik: to 500 rupaye me kya bipasha basu nachegi?

Ladka- Ghire hue badlo me teri yad ati h,
Saawan k ane me teri yad ati h,
Baris ki bundo me teri yad ati h,
Ladki- Haan haan muje yad hai teri Chatri deni hai...

Garmi Se Bachney K Liye
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Welcme to Bathroom

A FAITHFUL husband is one who.....
Always thinks of his wife while sleeping with other Women.

Rather than thinking of other women while sleeping wtih his Wife.

Santa-Mera ghar itna bda he ki usme local train chlti he.
banta-Bas,sale mera ghar itna bada he ki agar1se dusre kone chale jaao to roaming lagti he

GOLU-Jab B m tumhre ghr khana khata hu
Tumhara kutta mere khane ko ghoor kar dekhta h KYO?
MOLU-kyuki kutta apni Plate phchanta h mere dost.

Sir: Muhavre
Ka Istemal Karo..
'Muh Me Pani Ana'
Santa: Jaise Hi Maine Nal Ko
Muh Laga K Nal Chalu Kiya,
Mere Muh Me Pani Aa Gaya.

Sanata in firebrigade-Lady calld-"mere ghar aag lagi h
Santa-pani dalo.
Lady-dala,aag ni bujhi
S-"fir hm akar kya krenge,hm b to pani hi dalenge.

At a ladies garments shop,
MAN: I need a Ladies Salwar Suit..
Shopkeeper: Sir, wife k liye chahiye yaa kuchh acha sa dikhau?